Friday, December 29, 2006

Let us walk through this windless City.

Well! I'm finally alone!
Mummy and Daddy Trunks left this morning at 10.
It's all quiet and relaxed now at Spunky Mansions.
I have lots of ham to eat!

What the hell is going on with blogger? Most of the formatting has disappeared and pictures are in html. Spooky.

I will soldier on!

Right a new series.

Things near me wot are nice to look at/interesting - 1) Charlton House

First I trunk Mum and Dad trunks to the General Wolfe statue to look down upon the Queens House and assorted old buildings.

Then we drove to Charlton House.

It has very nice walled gardens.

Apparently this is the finest example of Jacobean architecture remaining in London.

Sorry boot the formatting! I really must work out what to do for new year!!!

(I've fixed it!)

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Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Deserve ain't got nothin' to do with it!

Look what angry got me for Christmas:



How blinking cool is that?

It was all fine until me dad totalled it into the Christmas tree! After a few repairs it was airworthy again though.

Anyway! Christmas day was a complete success in Spunky Mansions.

I was up at 10 am (early for me on a holiday) and commenced to was my turkey, rub salt in all over and stick seasoned butter under the skin. Chopped up me onions and carrots. Lopped the wings off. Piled it in a tray and lobbed it in the oven.

I then had a shower and popped round to Angry's to get some gravy thickening and my pressie (see above, I am shamed to say my present was nowhere near as cool).

Mum was hovering around bless her but not up to helping. So I prepared the rest and sorted things at the right times. I did chestnut apple and pork stuffing, roast potatoes, honeyed parsnips, sprouts (grooooo! that is commitment to the family), yorkshire pudding and lovely thick gravy to top it off. I have to say it was the hardest meal I've ever cooked. But it all came off and mum and dad loved it (especially pleasing as Mummy Trunks hasn't been eating well and doesn't enjoy her food at all at the moment). What a relief!

One thing though!

I forgot the sodding pigs in blankets!!!

The Bear had a lovely bit of tuna in case you're wondering!

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Monday, December 25, 2006

I reach the edge of town, I've got blood in my hair....

Well..
The trunks family are here and all is well so far.
(also Everton won yesterday which makes my weekend better).
Yesterday I got all the stuff in and my fridge is full to the brim. Today I finally managed to get hold of the book my dad wants and did all my wrapping.
Mummy Trunks looks a little better but is so skinny. She's just bones.
Anyway, I cooked em up a Spunky cottage pie and it went down a treat so all is well so far.
Tomorrow I must cook my first ever Christmas dinner though.
Wish me luck.
I will close with a picture of the burnt out Brighton pier:

Hope everyone has a wondrous day tomorrow and gets ace presents.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Strange somethings that will never sleep!

CHRISTMAS!
Well, work is over at Corporate Towers (at least for me!) so it was out of work early on Friday and into the pub.
On the way to the pub you cannot miss this:

That's how it looks in daylight (well, very foggy daylight).
I mean how cool is that????
Here it is against a background:
It's as tall as two houses!
AWESOME!
It's the coolest christmas lights I've ever seen.
Here it is in the dark:

Am I a bit too excited by this?
Anyway! We had a bit of a drinking sesh in the Wharf. Mavis the Fairy was there, Mott the Hoople (and her boyfriend Curly from the Three Stooges (he even speaks like him!)), R2D2, Angry, Tillface, Jinn, the Borrowers, The Hammer, Shaz & Dave, LooLoo, The Best Bottom on the Floor, Lorraine Kelly, Marshmallow Face, The Hoff and Lurch (the new gonk from business).
Lord knows where everyone else went.
A lot of booze was drunk and after one for the road myself, Angry and Tillface had a kebab and wandered home.
Today I did all the Christmas food shopping. It was hell! But I think I have enough to feed the Trunks Family for a few days.
Now all I have to do is tidy the flat!
Wish me luck.
HAPPY CHRISTMAS ALL!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

I wanna write a novel, freeze all your expressions into words.

A great bard once sang:
'Christmas time,
misteltoe and wine,
children singing christian rhyme.
With logs on the fire,
and logs in the loo,
It's time to enjoy
all the things that we do'

Inspired by such words, Spunky thought it was time to put up the tree:
Yeah, I know, a bit minimalist. But I'm just impressed I got the fucker up!
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
x


What a concept!

Saturday morning! Up quite early for me. England have thrown it away in the cricket again. No footie for me today as we're goona be trounced by Chelsea tomorrow. Don't get me onto football and the ruinous effect of too much money in the game!
Had a kebab last night. Nope, I hadn't been drinking. But it was late and I was hungry.
News this week:
My ex Aussie-dutch has had a baby!!!! A blinking baby! That now means at 4 of my ex's have had babies, and those are the ones I know aboot! It's a frightening thought. I think I'm behind the game a bit.
There was probably more news but not that interesting.
Right. I really must do something today. Yesterday I did nothing whatsover. Today I must start getting the flat in order for mummy and daddy Trunks. I've ordered the turkey, but it's going to be tricky as mummy trunks is still very ill and doesn't enjoy eating. Hopefully it will be a nice change for them both. Hard work for me cooking all week though.
WAIT! The Bear wants to go for a run......
The christmas cards are beginning to rock in, 11 so far, mind you I am counting one from Guinness and one from Lakeside.
Great series never die!!!
Cylindrical Buildings of the World - Number Six!
This is an oasthouse I stayed in last year for a holiday. It's only in Sevenoaks and it's cool only having to travel half an hour to be on holiday. It had a heated outdoor swimming pool (I skinny dipped!), but it also had spider's webs down the back of the chest of drawers.
Another great holiday arranged by my ex. She had a great talent for it. But then it was also a talent for squandering money.
Right! Next task! Take out the recycling.

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Friday, December 15, 2006

Fine dark chocolate with an aromatic taste of Arabica coffee

HELLO!
Spunky took the day off today. I'm not saying I'm psychic but I just knew I'd have a hangover. It was Corporate Hell's christmas lunch (at least my bigger team's) and we all tropped out to Pizza Express for Christmas lunch. Pizza bloody Express. Very festive indeed. I had the blandest pepparoni pizza ever recorded. Mind you the tiramisu was good.
I quaffed a fair bit of wine with my closest colleagues and we then went on to a yokel pub.
Entertainment was provided by some fucked up amateur dramatists doing a little play with St George killing a saracen and the dance of a black crocodile head. All very frightening. To add to the horror Santa Claus with a big white head turned up. It was like a great big pumpkin head.
I'm amazed I slept last night.
Later on we were entertained by the lovely Hammertime being chatted up by a west indian cicketing legend's son. He was smooth, smooth but obvious, 'You are so beautiful' was rolled out repetitively (he wasn't even drunk!).
I then meandered home with LooLoo and we had one for the road in The Ship and Billet, formerly known as the Frog and Radiator (home of Mike 'I'll cut yer' the Knife). But it was very friendly barring the fact that they were surfing the music channels at full volume for Christmas classics.
Personally I kept out of trouble once again (and was rewarded this morning by a phone call from my ex to make sure I was alone).
And today? Today I have done nothing. Ru-oh! Nothing. Nothing at all.
I'll leave you with a picture of a praying mantis that was on the ceiling outside our room in Langkawi:

I love praying mantii!

By the way! What the hell is going on with this new blogger that leaves big gaps between each paragraph??? Annoying.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

I look to the skies and the answer is clear....

Wednesday night.
Just watched Lost. Eko is dead! My favourite character, if they kill off Sawyer and Sayid it'll all be over for me. Jack is vacuous.
Tomorrow is my team christmas lunch. It is likely I will cosume much alcohol and become incoherent.I'll leave you with this picture of a hermit crab from Langkawi. As big as me fist. AND I have big fists. The hermit crabs were so cool. There was one with a tiny wee shell. Poor little thing was last in the queue at the housing association. Maybe it didn't have enough minority needs.
Ah! Look at the cheeky little fella peeking out at you!
Night all

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

And you my love, won't you take my hand?

Well! What a day. Actually, not a lot happened. Oh! I suppose I played footie and we won convincingly, I scored two! (mind you the better one was disallowed).

Wee man is back from his caribbean cruise and looks like he needs a wash, but he bolstered the defence impressively.

Right!
I'm on a roll, so!
Cylindrical Buildings of the World - Number 5

Look at this baby! Not only cylindrical and Latvian but old too! This is the powder tower in Riga's old town. A great place I'll tell you aboot later.

But now Spunky must sleep.

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Monday, December 11, 2006

My own pad! I'm going crazy!

You thought it was no more! But I have a long memory (if a litle patchy). What's that I see up on the hillside in San Francisco? It's not? Yes it is! It's the Coit Tower and it's:

Cylindrical Buildings of the World - Number 4

There you go! What a beauty!
I was called by the Dome today. All the way from Hong Kong, where incidentally it's 30C+. I spent 45 minutes chatting to the old goat. He's loving it out there, especially the wildlife.
On another note what is it aboot me that winds up one of me best mates? Every once in a while he just gets the arse with me. I suppose I can be annoying......
Speaking of which I moved desks today. For what reason? I don't know, to waste people's time I suppose. I am now back on the north side where I was 4 years ago. Have now done 3 sides of the building. If I can get a role in finance I can complete the set.
I do now have the advantage of being surrounded by women though.
Reet! To bed.

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Sunday, December 10, 2006

Don't you set those lonely eyes on me.

Yosemite to San Francisco
Off we trotted from Yosemite to wind our merry way to San Francisco (we had flowers in our hair don't worry).
Everything still looked really dry as we approached San Francisco and the roads go bigger and bigger. Most interesting sight on the way was this:
How many windmills is that!!!??? A lot! And the picture doesn't convey the true size!
First real sighting of the City was as we crossed a huge bridge (with an island in the middle)

I'm sure that's been in the odd film. Driving in was a mare! The street names are in the wrong direction. I thought we were doing well till I realised that what I thought was 5th street had changed to 11th via 6th, 7th, 8th etc. Also the one way system is carnage. I was navigating at this point and it was all my fault!
Our hotel was halfway up the hill between the Tenderloin and Union Square. Proximity to the Tenderloin gave some entertaining liasons with comedy drunks and mentalists. Getting to it was a mare though. Driving up preposterously steep hills avoiding street cars and getting lost in the one ways.
Once happily settled in, having been ignored by the rudest valet I've ever seen (he was too busy trying to flirt with an old lady). We set out for a quick explore. Just up the roads was where Francis Ford Coppola writes all his stuff (the interesting green building below) and the Transamerica Pyramid.


Alsdo this rather cool building covered in Jazz legends:
Our first sighting of the Coit Tower (you may hear aboot this later, note the shape!) There are so may steep hills it's a wanderers nightmare. Note at this point most of the holiday had been at temperatures of 40 to 50C it was now 15C.
We walk around Nob Hill (huh huh huh uh huh huh!) and Russian Hill and down, the alleged, crookedest street in the world. Very pretty and green and unlike anything else around:
From the top we had a pleasant view of the business district:
But this is my favourite photo of all:
I mean what kind of place has streets this steep! It's worse than Sheffield. Cool though. I was loving it already and we still had to go to the Wharf, Alcatraz, Golden Gate etc etc.....

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Saturday, December 09, 2006

Just got up today and my thoughts are miles away with you

Yosemite
Driving out from Death Valley was more desert, but getting a bit greener with plains full off scrubby little bushes (oooer).
Then I saw my first joshua tree! There were loads of them later on. Sadly their name has been sullied by tedious musical leviathans U2. But don't let this put you off, they are still cool (the trees not U2!).

We drove past a huge lake that is now a salt flat thanks to the excessive water demands of the west coast and then we started climbing towards Tioga Pass. We saw our first snow on the way (it was August). Tioga Pass is the eastern entrance to the Yosemite national park and is at a height of 10,000ft. Somewhat higher than anything in the UK. We pulled up just inside and had a sit by a lovely green meadow and lake.

It all felt very relaxing. We assumed we were nearly there when we pulled in at an information place, but we still had ages to go!!!
We gently worked our way down through tall trees and broad green meadows towards our goal. On the way we passed a small river and had a bit of a paddle.


Just before we reached Yosemite Village we passed El Capitan (our second of the trip) a great big rock face. If you look closely enough you can see climbers.

We got to our base and checked in. The dude on reception asked if we were 'bear aware'. I love that term, he said there are often bears in the car park at night. This led to me wandering around the car park in pitch black at midnight hoping to see one. Alas it was not to be. But I did see the Milky Way.
Outside our room we did see a Blue Jay though. Check the high hair on that mofo!
Next day we decided to go for a little bike ride around. Very relaxing and beautiful. We found a great big bear trap, a bit like sized up mouse one (not the neck breaking ones!!! surely that would be madness) it was like a skip.
We also saw a coyote wandering around. This one is easier to see. Can you spot it?
The highlight was a beautiful view of the most famous sight in Yosemite Half Dome:
A completely different experience to what was before but fantastic still.
This was definitely going to be a close run thing with the Far East for my best ever holiday.
Whilst we we showering and getting ready a squirrel snuck in and took a few bites out of my hershey bar! Only reason we knew was bite marks.
So it was back in the car and we set forth for San Francisco.

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Friday, December 08, 2006

They came for Dani Behr, I said 'she's over there behind the wardrobe'

Christmas Party 2006

Always entertaining the christmas party. For me this year, however, it was a thing of fear!
My ex was coming! AND my ex hates my ex, who was also coming. Now I know I said in the last post that shitting on doorsteps was poor BUT sometimes a man needs to shit and hasn't got the time to make the choice!
To be fair I have been around there for aboot 10 years too.
My ex is still upset and a big scene was on the cards as the other insists on talking to me and that make my ex lose her senses!
Fortunately, my ex decided not to come last minute and all was ok! So off to Great Portland Street we went. It was a disappointing turnout to be fair. Aboot 90 people I'm told. I know that's a fair few, but it used to be 200. Sadly the 'fun police' have been concentrating on destroying any team ethic or social fabric in our department and fewer and fewer people want to go.
Guess what the theme was!??? Go on guess! No? James Fucking Bond! Oh how original. You know how we knew when we got there? There was a cut out of Bond and a big poster. Bag of shite! We had a casino too, with pretend money and the dumbest croupier I've ever seen. Ever played black jack with a croupier who struggles to count to twenty? Jesus! It was like urinating treacle.
So, on to the meal! Soup, nice! Tukey and spuds! Not bad! Christmas pudding! 'I'll have two please!' Oh dear! Look what Santa did on Hether's pudding. Bad Santa!

He's only gone and done a white wee on it!
Ah the joy of secret santa. Every spends money on shit presents and keep piss poor stores in business.
I even ate the mince pie!
So then I played black jack for an hour with a lovely scottish lass. Then I danced with a lovely mexican lass. When I say danced I am maybe pushing the definition to its extreme. So Hethers gets so drunk he doesn't know who he is (not a big drinker our Hethers) and is jigging around on the dance floor knocking people over and covered in balloons (much to the displeasure of his bird).
At this point me and the Dome would normally take one of the disposable table cameras and take an anonymous shot of unholy parts of our bodies. Sadly Dome is in the Kong chasing the yellow dream, so I just had another Guinness.
It all went on till aboot 4 (with me avoiding a drunken middle aged lass who would do anything in the mean time) and then we toddled off home.
And I saw no misbehaviour.
Bobbins!

Once there was a sea here but there never was a door!

It's 4:40am and I'm back from the christmas party.
I'm somewhat the worse for wear, but in one piece and behaved impeccably.
Oh I was tempted. But I thought it best not to.
Shite and doorsteps etc.
I am now consuming a bag of macadamia nuts before bed.
I hope everyone in the whole world has a great weekend.
I shall leave you this picture I took whilst bombing down the M6.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Leave a light on, I'm coming home.

Sunday morning and your man Pants is a bit weary. This whole malarkey of having the cricket in Oz makes a man's life very tiring. We're not doing as well as hoped either, after a promising start. Ah well.

Anyhoo! What a beautiful morning (ok early afternoon). The sun is streaming in through the windows (showing the smears) and it nice and cheery.

[You see! That's why us Brits discuss the weather! One day it's like a great big grey soup, the next it's sunny and blue. It's all over the shop. It affects your behaviour.]

I have a number of lemon dilemmas:
It's nearly christmas, should I put the tree up? (T will probably want it)
T is taking the spare bed and my mum and dad (Godwilling) are coming down to stay over christmas.
As per the above but she is also taking the dining table and coffee table.
And microwave!
(how the hell did I cope before? I must've lived on the carpet.)
Should I bother contacting the girl with the feline eyes?
Should I start getting up earlier rather than being late for work?

Ack there are loads.

Hmmmm, I was gonna post more but the tool bar is absent!

Reet. I'd better go wash up then.

Friday, December 01, 2006

Summer moved on, and the way it went you can't tag along

What a horrible grey day!!!

However Pants had an interesting dream aboot Shakira last night:

"She was teaching me arc-welding whilst a walrus with a trumpet was slowly crushed between two sheets of toughened glass.
Then she ran her hand up my thigh and whispered in my ear:
'hoots mon Ive a ken to see yon walrus freed'
then i had to try and save the walrus in order to get a shag"

I thought I'd leave you with a sunbset from Borneo. You know I'm bloody lucky to have been the places I've been.

It's amazing how sometimes you don't appreciate it. Borneo was incredible.

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I'm on the inside, looking outside....

I rarely get amusing E mails at work. Yesterday I got two!
You shouldn't really laugh at this:

Or this:

But I did!
Had another meeting with my new boss yesterday. He knows what he's talking aboot, which is a bonus. A definite improvement. We'll see if I make the cut next year!