What gun? What dangerous place? You're a policeman!

For fucks sake! This stupid cunting system has fucked up again.

I write a whole post and press publish and end up with a internet page not found page.

What a waste of my freaking time!

If I hadn't already damaged my wrists I punch something.

ACK!

Anyway, it's reminded me of something that happened this afternoon:

I'm walking from my local subcontinental corner shop, with a bag full of Royal Sun cocunut water [Mmmmmmmmmm, it's a tasty!] and some lad leans out of the back window of a car and says 'Hello gorgeous' 'Can I have your phone number?' I said 'Errrr, no sorry'. His mates were giggling in the front.

Now am I a victim of:
a) a drive by homosexual proposition
OR
b) a drive by heterosexual homophobic prank
Answers on a postcard

He was quite cute, so I prefer a).

Anywhichway. Big Brother's Nikki is out!

Disapointing. She was very attractive until she opened her gob. The kind of flapping gob rarely seen outside Saint Temple's school of prententious child entertainers. BUT at least she did things inside the house.

When she was ejected, however, it made me realise who she looked like! She pulled this face and there it was! Dr Zira from 'Escape From the Planet of the Apes'!

Nikki - flapping mouthed haridan so facile that she went for Pete because of his popularity (a man whom she would sneer at in real life) albeit with a nice bum:

















Dr Zira - highly evolved chimpanzee who thinks nothing of dissecting humans in 'the name of science', albeit with a nice bum:















Right! Back to the cricket. Off to Lords tomorrow. It's an alcoholics paradise!

OH! One more thing! I had my 1,000th visitor today. (well from when I started measuring) and I was going to award a bottle of champagne. Sadly it was me!