He's a dirty old man, Nick the Chopper

Why do things I have done in the past always catch up with me?

Anyway! I have a new job. Can't be bad really.

People Wot Look Like Me VI

18) The Diet Coke Dude

Apparently if you cover the mouth up of this guy he looks like me.
Obviously I have a better body but.....

Love you, I ain't ever gonna love you.

Spunky is back from footie. Another glorious win for the boys. I was a bit rubbish though to be fair.

So? What's new? Well, bachelor life has too many problems to it. I had to do the washing up, clean up the bathroom, put sheets on the spare bed, fix a kitchen cabinet, pour sulphuic acid down the bathroom plugholes and get hair from the plug.

Where is the fun in all that?

A gratuitous picture of me in a posh pool in the Beverley Wilshire Hotel (where Richard Gere boned Julia Roberts in 'Pretty Woman')

People Wot Look Like me V

I posted this one before but it was lost to some cunting website jump. Anyway, enough of my foul language:

16) Roger Waters - I've had this one a couple of times, from Pants and Cazzy G. I mean it's not bad to be compared to the megalomaniac visionary but I know they do it cos he's got a big nose and fat lips.

I wish you were her to see it!!!!

People Wot Look Like Me IV

14) Chesney Hawkes - At the height of his popularity people suggested I look like 'the one and only'. He doesn't look too bad in this photie. But trust me, he's a lumpy faced horror.












15) Blair from Eldorado - I got this form two mates we made skiing in Crans Montana. Do I really look like this??? Well, maybe so. Anyway, spookily, in a previous place of work by the Thames he became a barman in the local pub. Not being one to let comedy lie I went up to him and said 'I look like you'. Greatly to his credit the man said 'You should be so unlucky'.

So wherever you are Josh Nathan I hope you are doing well.

Which way is Mecca, Which way is Mecca, Which way is Mecca

People Wot Look Like Me - III
11) David Walliams - Well he doesn't look too bad in this photo, but I can't say I'm happy with the whole campness thing. Thanks to the Pink Fairy for this, she insists I look like him, and normally she's so nice to me.







12) Jeff Bridges - My old work mate Mosschops swears I am the spit of this fella. Mind you he looks like an old ginger Jamie Oliver. I'm not to upset by this one, lacks character though.

Living legend, born to run, smartest c*** under the sun.

People Wot Look Like Me - II


5) Riley off Biffy The Vampire Slayer - never watched the show myself. Maybe it was his mannerisms. A girlfriend, whom I shall call 'Long Distance Lil', said I looked like him. Methinks a touch of rose tinted specs. Nice hair though.


6) Angel - Not sure why he's an angel, but he sure doesn't look like me. Too rugged, he has decent hair and can do one of them broody looks. Blame Long Distance Lil again for this one.

Speaking of which that takes me back.....one christmas I was going home to Carrot Roads County for christmas and she was staying there with relatives. It was christmas eve and I lay in bed in Cavendish Mansions Finchley wondering how I could make up for the fact that I had purchased no pressies. I lost a bit of sleep on this!

Anyway....next morning, me and my good mate Pantsfellah (I was going to call him Duracell but he's my oldest mate, I love him and childhood cruelty never stops hurting) set off for home up M't'6.

I pulled into a service station on the offchance and purchased:
1) A Eddie Izzard comedy tape
2) A squeezy child's train book
3) Some chocolate
4) Cuddly toy

We motor on and that night I meet up with her in the Derby Arms (avec my main man Pants). She brings out a great big box, it's a lava lamp! Thoughtful and useful, i'm in for it! But no! It's 'the most thoughtful presents I've ever had'. I reckon I was born lucky!

I dumped her next weekend......

7) Paul Merson - Not flattering. But I can see a grain of truth. I got this from some bloke on the tube. A complete random. So I guess it must be true.





8) Kurt Cobain - 1967 - 1994, famous dead dude and grunge hero. I would never complain aboot this, the man was a genuine legend and I only wish I had his voice. At the time I was dating 'Ginger Jo' (A wee craftslady more of well under 5' - shortest girlfriend I've ever had, but that's a different thread) and I was in grunge phase with long hair and goatee. She stuck some eyeliner on me and took some photos and I have to say it was closer than bloody Merson.



9) Stuart from Big Brother - Looks nowt like me, BUT he is my voice and mannerisms twin. When he was on Big Bro I had numerous people coming up to me and saying 'You sound just like that Stuart from Big Bro'. A morale builder.

10) Some Bloke Who Played for Barnet FC in the 90's - don't have a photo for this one, it's a net challenge though!.......Anyway, I'm walking through Kings X and some burly shaven headed dude comes up to me, shakes my hand and says 'How's it going?'. Happy to see an old friend, despite the fact I've never before seen him in my life I respond 'Not bad, how are you?'. 'Great' he says 'Are you still playing for Barnet?'. 'No' I say honestly 'I've never played for them'. 'Oh' says he crestfallen and disappears quickly into the crowd looking foolish.

If...they...hurt...you...they...hurt...me...too.

People Wot Look Like Me - I

1) Ian Botham, cricket legend and champion of eating for a healthy heart. (thanks to the Frontier Accountant for this, not sure I agree).

2) Val Kilmer, temperamental not quite mega star. I'm happier with this one (it's also the most common one I get) although I can't really see this one either, a bit too handsome........unless........

3. Val Kilmer as Batman. Ah! Now I see it! It's the fullsome lips! I have to say that below the nose I am his twin!!!

4. Nicolas Lynhurst - Only had this once and I can't say I enjoyed the experience. Well.......I suppose he physique is close.